First February Rehearsal

I am operating from an assumption that my ideas are a part of me. For example, if you had an ice cream flavor made of yourself it wouldn't taste like anything to you because it is what you walk around tasting all of the time (sideways stories from wayside school reference). In this way it is difficult to find your ideas because they are assumptions or habits you have in the world and in order to find them you have to go in and look around and pick stuff apart. Stuff that is hard to see because its always there and you don't constantly look at it. Like your own face which you can't see unless you look in a mirror. Or in rehearsal how working with another person acts as a mirror for your "operational assumptions" or "habits" which is where I'm deciding to say that my ideas come from. 

Magda's ideas come from a different place. She sees things. She has visions and makes drawings of them. She sees settings and costumes and characters. Everything has a meaning. I don't have ideas like this usually. This month we are trying to work in the studio separately and then come together to share our research. Part of the reason we are doing this is so I can work on developing a connection, respect, and confidence in my own ideas. This is why i spent much of my time in the studio today reflecting on where I think my "best ideas" come from. The above is what I've decided to be true. For now. 

I also went on to explore the difference between a "meaningless" phrase of movement and a "meaningful" phrase of movement. The exploration of movement creation from two different points of inspiration. "Meaningless" movement from function. Aesthetic. geometry. "Meaningful" movement from what makes me feel something. What movement feels like the fullest expression of myself in the moment and makes me feel stuff inside. This seems so self indulgent to me that it is difficult to write about. Ok this could be another post for later so I am done. 

Also I decided I'm a verb and not a noun.

CM